It’s been a while since I’ve written, so I thought I’d catch you up on the rollercoaster that is my life.

I’ve been back in the Netherlands for about four months, during which I have been working 20 hours per week for Prime Coalition and spending the other 20 hours figuring out what’s next. This consists of mostly drinks, lunches and dinners with all sorts of people, visiting company sites and long-overdue visits to friends from high school.

One portion of my time is spent on practical things, such as job hunting, applying for entrepreneurship programs, researching the recycling industry and deciding what kind of hard skills I want to develop. The other portion has been spent on an inward exploration of sorts, trying to figure out what I want in life and what is going to make me happy.

The practical stuff, that’s easy. It’s the whole figuring out life, that’s difficult. Do you remember, how at a certain point, I decided to call the chasm you fall into post-graduation the “black hole”? The black hole of infinite possibilities and zero directionality?

I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s never going to end. No matter where you are in life or how old you get. There will always be other things out there, waiting. It’s like that movie, Everything Everywhere All at Once. At some point, you just gotta choose. I wanted to say indecisiveness killed the cat, but apparently, it’s something squirrels struggle with.

So what have I been doing? I’m trying to take a simple approach. Not planning too far ahead. Taking the motto ‘find what feels good” to heart (yes, from Yoga with Adriene) and asking myself “Does it spark joy” on a regular basis. The key being, that there is only here and now. As Master Shifu from Kung Fu Panda said:

“Yesterday is history,
tomorrow is a mystery,
today is a gift...
that's why they call it the present”